That Frequently Asked Question (17 Jul 2016)

“So how? When’s your turn?”

“Next Chinese New Year please bring your boyfriend to introduce to us!”

“Why you still single?”

For those who are above 20 and are also single like me, these questions are just the tip of the iceberg of “FAQS”. Some time ago, some college friends and I formed what we call the “LHSC” (Lonely Hearts Singles Club), of which only 2 of us are still single today. Although that club was formed out of a joke, it is true that there are many different struggles that people who are single grapple with. Some may wonder if there is anything wrong with them, or if past mistakes have caused them to still be single today. Sometimes there can be disappointment in God for not bringing someone in their lives despite being a “faithful” follower. Some struggle with loneliness, unmet desires for intimacy, a low self-image, or are simply frustrated as they deal with pressure and expectations from friends and family to be in a relationship when they are not ready to do so.

At the end of the day, whether they are single ladies like me, single men, people who were married but not anymore or people who are widowed, people who are single are grappling with issues that are not too different from others who are
married. It can manifest in different forms, but ultimately, every human being searches for their identity and purpose – who they are and why they are here. Every human being deeply desires for love, acceptance and affirmation.

Romans 8:35, 37-39
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?…No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

We have been bought at a price by God, and we are His children, dearly loved. Nothing can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.

The world bombards us with lies that the love between a woman and a man is the best and perhaps the only form of love that anyone can ever have. But when we look at His Word, we see that God’s love far surpasses such limited human love. Unlike earthly relationships, God’s love is everlasting and unfailing. Whether we are single or married, God has a plan for each and every one of us. Man will fail us, but God never fails. When we obey God and keep His commandments as His dearly loved children, we experience a deep, lasting and full relationship with God. Do we sincerely believe this? Are we convicted of this truth in our hearts?

Some of us may never become brides, or we may have lost our spouse one way or another. But let us remember that we can look forward to the ultimate wedding of all time! Jesus is coming back and we the church will meet Him like a bride that meets her groom. We can desire to be married someday, but in the midst of that, do not miss the ultimate purpose of why we are here in this earth. Let us prepare for that wonderful wedding feast with Jesus and live in the light of eternity every day.


Sister Cherlyn Oh